Good evening, one and all. The primary purpose of this post is to establish a positive and wholesome impression of 07A14 in the minds of those outsiders voyeuristic enough to visit this web log.
Published below is a series of positive (not normative) statements that embodies our class spirit. Contrary to your expectations, these statements are fully representative of the entire student population of 07A14, and have not been deliberately worded or chosen to produce false impressions of those concerned.
01. We love Singapore.
02. We are proud to be Singaporean.
03. We love Hwa Chong Institution (College Section).
04. We love Hwa Chong Institution (High School Section) as well.
05. We are proud to be part of the Hwa Chong Yuan.
06. We all can sing the school song(s) from memory.
07. We keep strictly to all school rules.
08. We highly enjoy the food sold in the cafeteria.
09. We do not view ourselves as the elite.
10. We never litter.
11. We never hesitate to sing praises of the school.
12. We project the best image of Hwa Chong Institution (College Section) when out of school.
13. We constantly advertise the benefits of studying in Hwa Chong Institution (College Section) when at family gatherings, or whenever conversation with younger persons arises.
14. We always flush the toilets.
15. We always wash our hands with soap afterwards.
16. We participate actively in various co-curricular activities.
17. We support all school events.
18. We believe that animal cruelty cannot be condoned.
19. We never, never, ever miss our lessons.
20. We never eat in the classrooms.
21. We always save money for the school by switching off the air conditioner for 90% of the time.
22. We have great confidence in Hwa Chong Institution (College Section) to develop us to our maximum potential.
23. We are on extremely agreeable terms with all our seniors.
24. We finish all arithmetic tutorials five weeks before the topic is covered in lectures.
25. We are highly motivated, confident learners and enjoy encouraging others.
26. We always offer our seats on the MRT to someone who needs it more than we do.
27. We reject all forms of violence and peer pressure i.e. male bonding
28. We are the first to arrive and last to leave.
29. We give our utmost respect to every single figure of authority and believe that no one deserves to be made fun of.
30. We never, ever get caught.
Thank you. We hope that this has been a helpful guide to you.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Miss Scarlet in the Dining Room with a Knife
So like, there was school today. School's cool and all, we had like, literature lesson first of all and lit's like, 1337 because it's like funny and all, like how we produce to most brilliant of insights like "the first poem is written by a woman and the second one is by a man" and prompt the most flattering of compliments from Perry like "right, that's good, anymore obvious comments?" but really, litertature is like cool, I mean like, Mary Had A Little Lamb is lit, yo.
Anyway, after literature there was like Economics which is like a Mix of "Econs!" and "NOOOOOOO" and so like, I sat near the front of the class because like it's Our Favourite Lesson so like, I wanted to pay attention, and I'm glad I did 'cause like we learnt acronyms today man, like PPB (Production Possibility Boundary) and MRT (Mass Rapid Transit) and BBC (Beer Belly Curve), and like OH EPIPHANY: I just realised that the LAB you see printed on one/two/acouple/afew of his blue shirts stands for LIONEL ARTHUR BARNARD like ohmigawd! I almost thought it was from this computer game I used to play called Little Big Adventure? but that's LBA so I dismissed it and concentrated on BBC instead but like WOW EPIPHANY I've finally realised and I'm like, totally thrilled, probably more thrilled as I was when Zhang and I went to dig out old photos of our favourite White Men (not so much the Geography one because like, none of us take Geography man) and like Barnard totally looked like Tom Hanks man and he's like lean man, and I think being an economist really takes its toll on a person an economist assumes and I assume he went like "Let's *gulp* assume *gulp* that *gulp* Tiger *big gulp* Jooz *big gulp* doesn't *gulp* make *gulp* a *gulp* person *gulp* fat *SLURP*" and like downed the whole keg of it, or maybe he was just that kind he wanted to present us a live model of the BBC so like yeah, thanks Mr. Barnard, like totally.
And then there was history next and Docherty's like awahsoame and like he's got scars around his neck and stuff and I bet he got into like fights back in Glasgow where they like beat people up like people beaters and fighting's like cool because like, all the gangsters you see in shows all like fight and are like cool 'cause they have like tattoos and stuff and like look gangly and manly and stuff like, I wanna be a gangster 'cause like, gangsters have real friends who are scared of them and like have people owe them money and they like carry a chopper about 'cause they're like good with knives and I want to be good with knives as well so I can be a better gangster 'cause gangsters are cool and oh we learnt about American Economy and how they like dominate the market but whatever, he'll upload it on the SMB which is like, basically the same thing as EMB so yeah, he'll upload it there because Singapore's like, high tech and stuff, and maybe one day they'll have laser knives and that'll be really cool and I wanna be a high tech gangster.
So since we're talking about knives I'm going like ohmigawd?! I wanna take home economics becuase it's like economics with cloth and vegetables instead of butter and guns which are like deadly I mean like eew real gangsters carry knives 'cause they're sharp and can kill, so anyway I wanna take home econs so I can cook like a Real Man and talking about cooking after school Nadira, Melo and Korean came over and we like cooked like real Men and Women 'cause we like, used real food and right now I'm going like thank God for NTUC 'cause like that's where we got the real food from, so anyway we cooked Cold Noodles which are first boiled and I fouled up a tad 'cause I used too small a pot but anyway Big Pot To The Rescue and we managed to get three bundles of them buckwheat noodles in and like boiled them and cooked them and as a side dish we fried Japanese Chicken Wrapped with Seaweed because like we love Japan like if it was World War II right now I'd wish I was Japanese as long as I'm not in Hiroshima or Nagasaki 'cause like they got bombed like BOOOOM and like I think it might hurt so yeah, pain is bad, so thankfully the food we cooked wasn't poisonous or we'd be in some pain and that would quite suck, so anyway Nadira was frying them Japanese Chickens and it was still cold inside so we microwaved those few pieces and in the end they were kinda hard so cautionary tale to all you Real Men and Women wannabes, don't do this, instead just like fry them like our second batch of Japanese Chickens they were crispy and nice which complemented our not crispy and nice Cold Noodles which turned out quite well after some complications which involved us forgetting to dilute the Soba Sauce before we poured it in but anyway it was a success! so it's like booyah but then we had Ribena after that and it sucked like, suck, 'cause we used up all the ice cooling the noodles to make them Cold so we had like, warm Ribena which sucked, but one thing good that came out of this was a lesson in Economics because Ice is like Scarce, which is the Central Economic Problem because there's like a limited supply of Ice so if you put all your Ice into cooling Noodles to make them Cold you lose out on making your Ribena Cold so like, yeah resource management.
Anyway, after literature there was like Economics which is like a Mix of "Econs!" and "NOOOOOOO" and so like, I sat near the front of the class because like it's Our Favourite Lesson so like, I wanted to pay attention, and I'm glad I did 'cause like we learnt acronyms today man, like PPB (Production Possibility Boundary) and MRT (Mass Rapid Transit) and BBC (Beer Belly Curve), and like OH EPIPHANY: I just realised that the LAB you see printed on one/two/acouple/afew of his blue shirts stands for LIONEL ARTHUR BARNARD like ohmigawd! I almost thought it was from this computer game I used to play called Little Big Adventure? but that's LBA so I dismissed it and concentrated on BBC instead but like WOW EPIPHANY I've finally realised and I'm like, totally thrilled, probably more thrilled as I was when Zhang and I went to dig out old photos of our favourite White Men (not so much the Geography one because like, none of us take Geography man) and like Barnard totally looked like Tom Hanks man and he's like lean man, and I think being an economist really takes its toll on a person an economist assumes and I assume he went like "Let's *gulp* assume *gulp* that *gulp* Tiger *big gulp* Jooz *big gulp* doesn't *gulp* make *gulp* a *gulp* person *gulp* fat *SLURP*" and like downed the whole keg of it, or maybe he was just that kind he wanted to present us a live model of the BBC so like yeah, thanks Mr. Barnard, like totally.
And then there was history next and Docherty's like awahsoame and like he's got scars around his neck and stuff and I bet he got into like fights back in Glasgow where they like beat people up like people beaters and fighting's like cool because like, all the gangsters you see in shows all like fight and are like cool 'cause they have like tattoos and stuff and like look gangly and manly and stuff like, I wanna be a gangster 'cause like, gangsters have real friends who are scared of them and like have people owe them money and they like carry a chopper about 'cause they're like good with knives and I want to be good with knives as well so I can be a better gangster 'cause gangsters are cool and oh we learnt about American Economy and how they like dominate the market but whatever, he'll upload it on the SMB which is like, basically the same thing as EMB so yeah, he'll upload it there because Singapore's like, high tech and stuff, and maybe one day they'll have laser knives and that'll be really cool and I wanna be a high tech gangster.
So since we're talking about knives I'm going like ohmigawd?! I wanna take home economics becuase it's like economics with cloth and vegetables instead of butter and guns which are like deadly I mean like eew real gangsters carry knives 'cause they're sharp and can kill, so anyway I wanna take home econs so I can cook like a Real Man and talking about cooking after school Nadira, Melo and Korean came over and we like cooked like real Men and Women 'cause we like, used real food and right now I'm going like thank God for NTUC 'cause like that's where we got the real food from, so anyway we cooked Cold Noodles which are first boiled and I fouled up a tad 'cause I used too small a pot but anyway Big Pot To The Rescue and we managed to get three bundles of them buckwheat noodles in and like boiled them and cooked them and as a side dish we fried Japanese Chicken Wrapped with Seaweed because like we love Japan like if it was World War II right now I'd wish I was Japanese as long as I'm not in Hiroshima or Nagasaki 'cause like they got bombed like BOOOOM and like I think it might hurt so yeah, pain is bad, so thankfully the food we cooked wasn't poisonous or we'd be in some pain and that would quite suck, so anyway Nadira was frying them Japanese Chickens and it was still cold inside so we microwaved those few pieces and in the end they were kinda hard so cautionary tale to all you Real Men and Women wannabes, don't do this, instead just like fry them like our second batch of Japanese Chickens they were crispy and nice which complemented our not crispy and nice Cold Noodles which turned out quite well after some complications which involved us forgetting to dilute the Soba Sauce before we poured it in but anyway it was a success! so it's like booyah but then we had Ribena after that and it sucked like, suck, 'cause we used up all the ice cooling the noodles to make them Cold so we had like, warm Ribena which sucked, but one thing good that came out of this was a lesson in Economics because Ice is like Scarce, which is the Central Economic Problem because there's like a limited supply of Ice so if you put all your Ice into cooling Noodles to make them Cold you lose out on making your Ribena Cold so like, yeah resource management.
29/1 - A Monday
[Adapted from own blog, second time -_-]
After ponning (unintentional!!!) CT on friday, (15 members of) A14 looked forward to 1) Epic Smiting 2) Counter Strike on Monday's CT session. This did not occur, due to PE Conditioning, where A CERTAIN TWO HP CLASSES DID NOT BRING THEIR PE UNIFORM NEARLY IN ENTIRETY. This somehow turned into a blessing in our having to only walk one round, while the dutiful PE-Bringing-students had to run two. We also did the Apollo Fac Dance on the way, cause we're bored like that.
This was followed by literature, which was expectedly boring, up until our being released 10 minutes early EXCEPT A CERTAIN FIFTEEN INDIVIDUALS IN A14. Burge Almighty, however, turned out to be a forgiving idol, not only sparing us from his divine smiting, but also once again enlightening us with his holy decree, "Thou Shalt Not Get Caught". Community Service is still upon us, though we know not the place nor time nor method of it.
History was supposed to be extremely painful. 1.5hrs! of SEA! But then it's Miles! We started off the lesson with an ensemble of polo mints in the shape of a happy face, which was carefully covered by a yellow file once Miles stepped in and discovered our ** plan. This was followed by a barage of attempts to squeeze something, anything out of him ("POLish Museum", "POLish Nationalists", "Could you tell us about the Burmese student nationalists in relation to japanese school girls?"ILOVEYOUYONGJIE). Somewhere along the line he broke down and began telling us the nice stories we so desired, including Barnard's supposedly suave-looking appearance of the past,
and his first encounters with Singapuranese students. Of course, no one could forget his priceless expression in reply to "So who's the sex symbol of the HP tutors now?" Hot damn I wish we could've taken a pic of that.
The story of good-looking Barnard of the past was later followed up by a search in the library in school year-books from the 1980s to discover Barnard's old looks by MarcuBobSho and I, which turned out to be surprisingly easy since there's this section dedicated to the HP(and the other subject faculties too) tutors, making it easy to find Barnard. And he really did look good back in the day, akin to Tom Hanks. We even laid out the yearbooks in order showing Barnard's gradual growth and progression over the years. Also, Miles looked absolutely HIP back in the day. We would've taken pictures, but Asshole Alan and Resplendent Rachel refused to break away from their work on Emcee scripts, so we had no camera and no therefore pics. :(:(:(
Math came into play somewhere before that, with me, for the first time this year, NOT doing my math ahead of the lesson. Which turned out to be pleasant, since 1) it is a PAINFUL and GRUELING process to do math ahead of time, especially when you aren't *that* good at math 2) Ms/Mrs Lim's teaching somehow seemed much better when I didn't have an idea already of what ought to be taught already formed in my mind, I guess my previous judgment of her teaching was unfair in this sense. And I was beginning to like math again to. THEN THEY ANNOUNCE THE SECOND CHAPTER IS OUT AND XINGKAI[Universal Man of Science] AND FRIENDS ARE GOING TO DO TO 2D BEFORE I'M EVEN DONE WITH 1D.
I wasted some time with Zhihao thereafter discussing some See² concept stuff. We became increasing frustrated and random trying to think up JUST 2 more topics for participants to discuss, when I ripped up our well organized writing paper, and a message was delivered to us (was originally "Purpose & Prospects" and "Aims & Relevance", two entirely equivocal topic titles). Sometime during the discussion Fo popped by and we were debating whether or not to pon Mr. Chaos' 2 Hour InfoComm Rep lecture.
Fo and I later left for A14 again(originally meant only as a temporary stop before heading to Fac Dance), where we played Bluff with the guys in class for a bit. It was then that it happened. SHANG DA returned from his epic pilgrimage to Donut Factory,Raffles City with a boxful of a DOZEN DELICIOUS DOUGHNUTS. There was joyous feasting and ceremonious laughter at Alan after WONDERFUL WASTED chocolate dripped DELECTABLY over his shirt, and Benchow subsequently licking it. The girls didn't finish their PRECIOUS PASTRIES because they can't handle manly food. Incidentilly, because he had delivered unto us these sacred offerings, Shang Da has reached a level of impeccable manhood, amplified only by his self-proclaimed love for little girls.
Fo and I wasted an awful amount of time at InfoComm Rep briefing doing nothing and talking about how pitiful her life-with-chinese-lessons is.
I later convinced Zhihao to go to Ang Mo Kio with me, though this was settled upon only after a Dance Off at the computer labs where we showed each other our faculty dances. We spent a lot of time talking about a whole load of nothing while walking around getting my DS Lite warranty settled and borrowing books. We left each other with a passionate hug and a kiss goodbye and then I took a bus home.
After ponning (unintentional!!!) CT on friday, (15 members of) A14 looked forward to 1) Epic Smiting 2) Counter Strike on Monday's CT session. This did not occur, due to PE Conditioning, where A CERTAIN TWO HP CLASSES DID NOT BRING THEIR PE UNIFORM NEARLY IN ENTIRETY. This somehow turned into a blessing in our having to only walk one round, while the dutiful PE-Bringing-students had to run two. We also did the Apollo Fac Dance on the way, cause we're bored like that.
This was followed by literature, which was expectedly boring, up until our being released 10 minutes early EXCEPT A CERTAIN FIFTEEN INDIVIDUALS IN A14. Burge Almighty, however, turned out to be a forgiving idol, not only sparing us from his divine smiting, but also once again enlightening us with his holy decree, "Thou Shalt Not Get Caught". Community Service is still upon us, though we know not the place nor time nor method of it.
History was supposed to be extremely painful. 1.5hrs! of SEA! But then it's Miles! We started off the lesson with an ensemble of polo mints in the shape of a happy face, which was carefully covered by a yellow file once Miles stepped in and discovered our ** plan. This was followed by a barage of attempts to squeeze something, anything out of him ("POLish Museum", "POLish Nationalists", "Could you tell us about the Burmese student nationalists in relation to japanese school girls?"ILOVEYOUYONGJIE). Somewhere along the line he broke down and began telling us the nice stories we so desired, including Barnard's supposedly suave-looking appearance of the past,
and his first encounters with Singapuranese students. Of course, no one could forget his priceless expression in reply to "So who's the sex symbol of the HP tutors now?" Hot damn I wish we could've taken a pic of that.
The story of good-looking Barnard of the past was later followed up by a search in the library in school year-books from the 1980s to discover Barnard's old looks by MarcuBobSho and I, which turned out to be surprisingly easy since there's this section dedicated to the HP(and the other subject faculties too) tutors, making it easy to find Barnard. And he really did look good back in the day, akin to Tom Hanks. We even laid out the yearbooks in order showing Barnard's gradual growth and progression over the years. Also, Miles looked absolutely HIP back in the day. We would've taken pictures, but Asshole Alan and Resplendent Rachel refused to break away from their work on Emcee scripts, so we had no camera and no therefore pics. :(:(:(
Math came into play somewhere before that, with me, for the first time this year, NOT doing my math ahead of the lesson. Which turned out to be pleasant, since 1) it is a PAINFUL and GRUELING process to do math ahead of time, especially when you aren't *that* good at math 2) Ms/Mrs Lim's teaching somehow seemed much better when I didn't have an idea already of what ought to be taught already formed in my mind, I guess my previous judgment of her teaching was unfair in this sense. And I was beginning to like math again to. THEN THEY ANNOUNCE THE SECOND CHAPTER IS OUT AND XINGKAI[Universal Man of Science] AND FRIENDS ARE GOING TO DO TO 2D BEFORE I'M EVEN DONE WITH 1D.
I wasted some time with Zhihao thereafter discussing some See² concept stuff. We became increasing frustrated and random trying to think up JUST 2 more topics for participants to discuss, when I ripped up our well organized writing paper, and a message was delivered to us (was originally "Purpose & Prospects" and "Aims & Relevance", two entirely equivocal topic titles). Sometime during the discussion Fo popped by and we were debating whether or not to pon Mr. Chaos' 2 Hour InfoComm Rep lecture.
Fo and I later left for A14 again(originally meant only as a temporary stop before heading to Fac Dance), where we played Bluff with the guys in class for a bit. It was then that it happened. SHANG DA returned from his epic pilgrimage to Donut Factory,Raffles City with a boxful of a DOZEN DELICIOUS DOUGHNUTS. There was joyous feasting and ceremonious laughter at Alan after WONDERFUL WASTED chocolate dripped DELECTABLY over his shirt, and Benchow subsequently licking it. The girls didn't finish their PRECIOUS PASTRIES because they can't handle manly food. Incidentilly, because he had delivered unto us these sacred offerings, Shang Da has reached a level of impeccable manhood, amplified only by his self-proclaimed love for little girls.
Fo and I wasted an awful amount of time at InfoComm Rep briefing doing nothing and talking about how pitiful her life-with-chinese-lessons is.
I later convinced Zhihao to go to Ang Mo Kio with me, though this was settled upon only after a Dance Off at the computer labs where we showed each other our faculty dances. We spent a lot of time talking about a whole load of nothing while walking around getting my DS Lite warranty settled and borrowing books. We left each other with a passionate hug and a kiss goodbye and then I took a bus home.
Monday, January 29, 2007
Our assistant CT rep is damn sexy.
Do you not agree. =D
Why is it that some of our subjects are like OMGISTHATABULLETJUSTFLEWPASTME while others are like zzz. Take stuff like math, and history, and econs! And compare to say lit and KI. D: I'm confused.
IF YOU DO NOT YET KNOW THE FAC DANCE LIKE THE BACK OF YOUR HAND: dance more, my lovelies. ;D
Oh and random quotes:
"Stop the world, I want to get off!" - Mr Barnard
"You're so laid back, you're horizontal." - Mr Burge, in one of the seniors' lessons >.<
WHAT DID MR MILES SAY DURING HISTORY TODAY OMG.
Why is it that some of our subjects are like OMGISTHATABULLETJUSTFLEWPASTME while others are like zzz. Take stuff like math, and history, and econs! And compare to say lit and KI. D: I'm confused.
IF YOU DO NOT YET KNOW THE FAC DANCE LIKE THE BACK OF YOUR HAND: dance more, my lovelies. ;D
Oh and random quotes:
"Stop the world, I want to get off!" - Mr Barnard
"You're so laid back, you're horizontal." - Mr Burge, in one of the seniors' lessons >.<
WHAT DID MR MILES SAY DURING HISTORY TODAY OMG.
Once again, the first post ever
Once again, the first post ever.
07A14-ers, if you're not currently able to post to this blog, please register an account at blogger, and contact me @ zhansheng@gmail.com
07A14-ers, if you're not currently able to post to this blog, please register an account at blogger, and contact me @ zhansheng@gmail.com
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